” My eyes flickered open to see Nolan sitting on the edge of my bed. My eyes wondered around the room for a moment to realize that it was dark outside, as well as in my room, beyond a small light entering from the hallway. “What time is it,” I asked him, rubbing my eyes in my palms. “I said a couple of hours not like six hours.” “I’m sorry,” he frowned, looking over at me. “I could not bring myself to wake you up.” “Why,” I asked curiously, raising my eyebrow in his direction. “Because you looked so peaceful,” he smiled, looking away from me. “Sorry I didn’t wake you up like you asked.” “It’s okay,” I informed him. “Just means I am going to have trouble sleeping tonight is all.” “Sorry,” he said again. “I will wake you up like you ask next time.” “That is all I ask,” I laughed, rolling over and placing my head on top of the pillow this time. “Care to join me?” I patted the pillow beside my head and gave him a smile. He shrugged his shoulder and curled up next to me, both our eyes. Of course,they didn't realize I had no intention of fighting any effort toterminate me. But thanks to their lack of nerve, I soldiered on.My drinking was steadily increasing. I kept a bottle of Kahlua in mybottom desk drawer and kept my coffee spiked throughout the work day.This of course was in addition to my after-work wine consumption.Somehow, though, I managed to keep it together while on the air...atleast for a little while longer.I think it all started to come apart the night I came home to discoverthe front door of my condo open. I had been the victim of a burglary. Allof my electronic gear and my jewelry box was gone. Those things didn'tmatter to me too much; they could be replaced. But when I found thecontents of my underwear drawer dumped on the floor, and no sign of thecostume gun, I felt like I had been kicked hard in the stomach.I sat on the edge of the bed for a long time. I was almost in shock; thenI began to cry. I realized with the gun gone, and no way to replace.
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